Author Topic: How disgustingly targetable wealthy citizens are that have big paper money bills  (Read 659 times)

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Offline badon

Coin World published a commentary on an interesting article in Scientific American about the filthiness of paper money:

How disgustingly filthy our paper money can be | Coin World

It seemed harmless to make people aware of the threat of infection if money is handled without good hygiene. Simple hygienic practices like avoiding touching anything else until after hands are washed is an effective way to prevent infection. For myself, I used to get sick seasonally with influenza (flu), rhinovirus (common cold), etc like everyone else, until I stopped touching things unnecessarily. When practiced religiously ("cleanliness is next to godliness"), I can go several years in a row with nothing more than a little scratchy in the back of my throat. I don't use other people's pens, I have my own. If someone asks to borrow a pen, I let them keep it.

I have a bottle of hand sanitizer for cases where it's inconvenient or impossible to avoid cross-contamination. A good example of an inconvenient situation is at a restaurant. My food, my utensils (fork, chopsticks), my napkin, and my plate are all clean enough, but the bottles of condiments (ketchup, soy sauce), and the menu, have probably never been cleaned since the dawn of time, with all manner of primordial beasties just waiting to be transported to their new forever-home inside the skull of a nose-picking, flicking, or scratching restaurant patron. I read the menu, I drench my rice in soy sauce, and then I sanitize my hands before I touch anything else that is supposed to be cleaner. My food enters my mouth as cleanly as it was prepared by the chef, thoroughly sterilized by a hot pan or wok.

So, yes, I have no problem accepting the notion that money can be ridiculously filthy. If you're not convinced, next time you go to your favorite restaurant, consider the fact that criminals hide their cash in their sweaty butt cracks to ensure they still have a little money left after they get robbed by police or other criminals. If that money was clean before it went in, it's definitely not clean when it comes out. I'm glad Con World and Scientific American are making people aware of why they get sick regularly, every year, like clockwork. No, it's not the cold air that makes you sick every year, it's the hot and sweaty butt cracks.

Mmm...All this talk about restaurants and Buck Cratts is making me hungry.

After fantasizing about a fine meal at Buck Cratts,  I continued reading around at, and I found this article published about a month before the article about dirty money:

Former Treasury secretary Lawrence Summers recommends end to $100 note | Coin World

2 articles back-to-back that villainize cash? That's strange. I decided to take a look at the original Scientific American article, instead of being satisfied with only Coin World's commentary about it:

Dirty Money - Scientific American

"Perhaps all money should be laundered."

Uh-oh, the first sentence is literally about the government's interest in taking other people's money. That's very conspicuously out-of-place politics, clawing its way to prominence in a publication devoted solely to science. So, I skipped to the bottom to find out who wrote the article, and why. I expected to find out the article was written by a respected professor tenured at a prestigious university that relies on funding from the government, but no. Much like the first sentence, there was nothing subtle about it:

"Dina Fine Maron is an award-winning journalist [...] based in Washington, D.C."

As everyone already knows, no lying, murdering, and thieving EVER comes out of Washington DC! Well, she's not a scientist, and the science she quotes in the article is itself mere data, not published science. In fact, it's not published at all, it's actually just a conversation she had with a university student...Oh, but that's OK, because the unpublished data in the conversation with the student is also cited by another non-political, unbiased, and entirely scientific source, The Wall Street Journal.

But still, I have to ask, why does Dina Fine Maron's article not mention anything about what I call the "Sick Stick" - that non-disposable, never-cleaned, inkless electronic penless pen everyone has to use to crappily sign their name on a paperless screen after using a cashless credit or debit card form of payment? Maybe it's a minor oversight that can be forgiven. After all, the Sick Stick is still probably cleaner than cash, especially if we're talking about a lot of cash. $1 million USD in cashless electronic payments would be a lot lighter and more convenient than $1 million USD in a 2.2 pound (1 kg) bundle of $100 bills.

What's that you say? 2.2 pounds is TOO light? Oh yes, that's what Lawrence Summers said in the aforementioned article about eliminating $100 bills.

So, 2.2 pounds is too light, but weightless cashless inkless penless paperless fiat is NOT too light? Which is it? Too heavy, or too light? If the weight of money is such an important tool for crime fighting, then why not mint big bulky $100 coins? They last decades or centuries longer than paper, and no crook is going to be able to run away from a bank heist with a million of them. Why haven't the people in Washington DC proposed this obvious solution too-light money? Why are they proposing even weightless money as the solution to too-light money?

Forgive me, but I'm skeptical that the weight of money (or its hygienic properties) is really an important factor in crime fighting. In fact, it looks to me like this is all a bunch of political bias, lying, murdering, and thieving intended to criminalize possession of anything the governments want to seize for themselves. Good for them. You can keep your Sick Stick, and your fiat. I don't want it...unless it's free! I would be happy to take all those pesky $100 bills off your filthy hands :) I have bills to pay!

2013 Garden Coin Lan Ting Silver Antique Finish;2oz PCGS 69

Apologies for picking on Dina Fine Maron. It's actually a nice article she has written. I'm just being hypercritical to entertain myself. I'm the only one that reads my articles anyway :) Cheers!
« Last Edit: 2017 Feb 23, 02:46:05 AM by badon »